You sent the invites out weeks ago thinking that was the end of dealing with the guest list. If only that were true! Now comes the task of creating a seating chart or forgoing that all together and allowing your guests to roam and sit wherever they please.
I’m going to be honest, as a wedding planner with 7+ years of experience, assigned seating has always made for a more enjoyable and relaxing reception. I know this is where you roll your eyes at me and say, “but it is sooooo much work and a huge headache to create!” Trust me, I know and agree with you. I created one for my wedding and even though I may have shed a tear or two from frustration, it made my big day so much more enjoyable knowing the family members that didn’t get along were on opposite sides of the room! Can I get a Hallelujah!? I know you feel me on that point.
How do you choose? Well, let’s go over some pros and cons, to help you decide.
Pros for assigned seating.
- Chaos and conflict control – like I shared above keeping those family members or potential frenemies away from each other lends itself to a lower chance they mingle together. And that is always a good thing!
- Bridal party and immediate family are ensured seats. – Nothing is worse than coming back in when cocktail hour is wrapping up and all the pictures have been taken to find that there are no seats together or close to the couple. In my experience, even when a “reserved” sign is present, guests who feel particularly close to the couple or immediate families will still sit at these tables with no regard to their intended occupants.
- Older guests and kids are a comfortable distance from speakers and out of high-traffic walkways.
- Easier for your caterer to ensure a smooth and quick food service for plated or family-style dining.
- Shows you considered your guests! – This is so important. They know you thought about how they would enjoy your event best and truly appreciate it.
Cons for assigned seating.
- Added stress. – Yes, this won’t be easy and you may want to throw in the garter – or towel, whatever works! – but has anything worthwhile every truly been easy? Just sayin’.
- Additional cost for escort cards/signage/goodies. – Get off Pinterest! Don’t make this more complicated than necessary, unless you really love tea dying 150 individual escort cards like I did (what a nightmare that was!) then, by all means, knock yourself out!
Well, that’s really all the cons for assigned seating. Like I said it really is the way to go for most events, but let’s continue and you decide what is best for your big day.
Pros for open seating.
- RSVP’s are only for headcount. – You have no reason other than getting a solid headcount for those RSVP cards, now.
- No worrying about unforeseen plus ones or no shows. – Your guests can move and sit with whomever they chose.
- Saving $$$ – No additional costs for escort cards/signage/goodies. (Did we just turn a negative to a positive? Yep, sure did! We showed assigned seating what’s up!)
- Works fine for buffet-style receptions.
Cons for open seating.
- Guests will leave earlier. – When certain people are in an uncomfortable situation they tend to head home sooner. Just imagine grandma by the DJ’s speakers for hours. She would prefer her comfy chair at home watching Joanna Gaines on HGTV (I mean who wouldn’t?! She is the best!) then continuing to play out that scene from Night at the Roxbury’s.
- Potential for chaos and conflict to ensue. – Watch out, Aunt Judy and cousin Dennis could end up right next to each other! Yikes!
- Possibility of no seating near the couple for bridal party or immediate family. – Of course, a head table gives the bridal party a secured seat, but not the family taking pictures with you during cocktail hour.
- It can cause guests to feel uncomfortable. – Gah! Remember eating lunch looking over at all the cool kids and wishing they would invite you over? No, not you, ok, yeah, me neither.
Now, that we have touched on so many pros and cons for both assigned seating and open seating I feel that you can confidently make the choice that works best for you and your event.
You know the saying Happy Wife, Happy Life. Well, first it was said Happy Guest, Happy Wedding! Or at least that’s what I’ve been told.
To a night that lasts FOREVER!
Warmly, Emily
Co-Owner + Venue Coordinator of Forever 5 Events